Liquid Euphoria

Though I haven't exactly found euphoria yet after being on this juice diet for two days now, I do feel some changes:

1. Wednesday and Thursday I was feeling like crap. Sore throat, body aches, mild headaches. Since being on the juice diet. . . I feel much better. Yay. BUT-- was the change in health due to caffeine withdrawls? Perhaps.

2. And, like the book said, I have a strong desire to organize. Yesterday I took down all the Halloween decorations (and there were a lot-- 10 boxes, almost tops Christmas at 13), drug the 16-foot stage I built a few weeks ago all the way into the garage, then rearranged all the boxes to sit on top of it.

3. I have lost weight. I think 5 pounds in four days. And I'm certain that if I stick with the liquid diet I'll peek at 120, a number I haven't seen on the scale since college.

BUT..... I am starving. Cranky. Irritable. My skin itches. My stomach growls. I do not LIKE this 3-day cleanse at all. The juices are pretty yummy, with the exception of today's strawberry-grapefruit-mint concoction (I think there may have been too much grapefruit).

Then, there's the cost of all this, which isn't euphoric at all, but it does leave my head spinning. For example, my strawberry-grapefruit-mint juice cost me about $8.50. I, of course, used organic strawberries, at $6.99/pound, because if I'm detoxing, I don't want pesticides in my system, right? Sure. Whatever. But the "other" strawberries are friendlier with my wallet. And really, to waste all that produce on a drink I didn't even enjoy...

To eat at In-N-Out would cost about $5. Yuuuuuuum.

Liquid Euphoria. Hmmmmm.... I'll give it another day or two, until the heaps of greens in my refrigerator drawers run out. Then I'll replace them ... perhaps with BEER (my other kind of LIQUID EUPHORIA)!!!!

NO-vember

I am starting out the month with a detoxifying, three-day, juice-only cleanse. So far so good. No sugar, no alcohol, no caffeine, no processed foods. . .

Welcome to NO-vember.

I'm not doing it to lose weight, though shedding the bike tire stuck around my waist would be nice. I'm doing it to "start over"--rid my body of all toxins and just, well... see how I feel! Supposedly I'll feel more energetic, have better skin, and even gain a sense of euphoria.

Imagine that. . . a sense of euphoria. Without chardonnay? I'll have to wait and see.

I bought a juicer and have been in Whole Foods every day buying fresh veggies and fruits. The grocery bills are soaring. And for the heaping amounts of fruits and veggies I put into that machine (very expensive, organic-nly, might I add), only a few precious ounces come out at the other end. I gulp down the green goodness like I've just stepped off the set of Survivor. Tons of foliage equals sippy cup results.

But the book says it's cheaper than eating unhealthy and drinking alcohol. Maybe. But the latter is a hell of a lot more fun.

Quick Trip

I started to title this entry, "Quick Trip Home" then realized, Salinas isn't home anymore, is it?

I drove down Highway 68 with a lump in my throat. The autumn afternoon sun shone down on the massive maple leaves adorning the pastures on either side of the road. Mia and Cooper made their little innocent comments, "I remember this place," or "Mommy, did I grow up here?" as I fought hard to choke back the tears. As I passed miles of old barbed wire fences, I thought about blissful memories of the past thirteen years. The day was gorgeous. The air was crisp and golden. And I had to keep telling myself, "it isn't always like this."

I do love the weather in Santa Clarita. I love the heat. I love that there is actually a summer. And I love that summer stretches far into fall (and may even poke it's nose into winter). I love having a pool just steps from my back door. I love the stable where I board my horse. And I love my neighbors. God, I love my neighbors! (see previous post about hide-and-seek!)

But I miss the quaint, country charm of Salinas and the old buildings downtown. I miss the lush greenery. I miss that everybody knows each other somehow. I miss having ten acres of privacy and all of the smells and wild sounds and bright evening stars that go with the territory. I miss that Monterey and Carmel and all the shops and restaurants and wineries are only thirty minutes away. I miss having an elementary school that I don't have to worry about. And most of all, I miss my friends. God, I miss my friends.

Every time I return to Salinas I find myself doing two things: 1. I avoid driving to my old home like the plague, and 2. I am constantly outweighing the "pros" and "cons" of the two cities, just as I did here.

My old home will be rented out soon. Someone else will be living in the country retreat I spent years making a home. Someone else will be making memories on those tile floors, filling the large rooms with laughter and enjoying the sights and smells of the oaky knoll.

In a way it's a good thing. It just buys me more time to outweigh the "pros" and "cons" of each town.

Hurdles

So I made it past the 3:00pm hurdle and didn't crack open a bottle. I ate healthy all day, following the 1,000-calorie Brazilian Butt Lift diet. I drank lots of water, too. But at 6:00pm I tripped over a hurdle and fell. Hard.

I was on the phone with a good friend of mine from Salinas, laughing and chatting away, when I absent-mindedly reached for a bottle of cabernet and popped it open. I sipped it's rich redness while gossiping away, seated in a lawn chair in the cul-de-sac. Hurdle: 1, Alli: 0

For dinner, I had a small bowl of butternut squash soup and two slices of quesadilla. The soup adheres to the diet; the cheesy goodness smooshed between the toasty tortillas? Not so much. Hurdle: 2, Alli: 0

But then... I took it a step further. As usual.

The kids were enjoying large mounds of Ben-n-Jerry's Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough ice cream. After scooping out the creamy goodness for them, I divulged upon the rest. One half-pint of dairy wonder down the hatch. As I drifted into euphoria, I read the back of the carton: "we made the world's first batch of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough ice cream in 1984, inspired by a customer's anonymous note on our scoop shop's suggestion board." Hmm. Interesting fact. That's good party trivia, I thought. I'm so glad I ate this ice cream, otherwise I would have never known that!

But not once did I think about turning the carton around to reveal the nutrition information; the frightening reality that I had just doubled the 270-calorie serving size into 540 mindless, vengeful calories that would soon be residing... on my ass.

Hurdle: 3, Alli: 0

Brazilian Butt Lift Diet, you are kicking my ass. In all the wrong ways.

Slimming the Bum Bum

I ordered the "Brazilian Butt Lift" workout from the internet-- sixty bucks for three DVD's and a meal plan. About a month ago I tried the six-day, 1,000-calorie meal plan and failed after day two.

I tried again yesterday and only made it to 3:00, when I opened a bottle of wine and paired it with chips and pineapple salsa.

Today I am trying again. High fiber cereal in the morning so far and ONE cup of coffee. Then, the Bum Bum workout (pronounced Boom Boom).

Yes, Bum Bum. Thirty four agonous minutes in front of the tv and my BUM BUM is on fire.

My friend Natalie Flightner posted something on her Facebook wall that said,

So... how's this....???

I think this proves I trained SUPER HARD!!!!

Ready or Not, Here I Come

Hide-and-Seek, according to Wikipedia, is a variant of the game tag, in which a number of players conceal themselves in the environment, to be found by one or more seekers.


Hide-and-Seek on Carol Court is played with it's own variances: 


1. Sauce up all players on a few bottles of wine (or sake, or tequila, or whatever poison is presented that evening).
2. Jump out of your chair as fast as you can when a member of the group leaves the festivities momentarily (usually to take a pee break).
3. One does not need to conceal themselves completely, but aim to be absorbed by the environment. See examples below.

Found ya!

Tuesdays

Business executives say Tuesday is the most productive work day of the week. That being said, I do come to realize that today I did, in fact, get a lot of shit done (excuse the French).

Mia is home sick so I did what any mother would do, I loaded her and Cooper up and drove to the stables. Well, that's not what any mother would do. Most mothers would probably keep their sick kids at home, wrapped up in blankets, read books to them, and serve them warm chicken noodle soup. But a cowgirl mother does things a bit differently. She has a horse to care for, too, and caring for horses is somewhat of a therapy for pent-up domestic frustrations, (ie. two sick kids at home on a Tuesday). Therefore, a cowgirl mother (if that is even a correct term, but it certainly paints an interesting picture in one's mind) grabs The Lion King DVD, a few bags of Doritos, two beach towels and some juice boxes and heads for the ranch. The beach towels are spread out in the back of the SUV, the children are given their snack and told not to touch each other.. "or else" (and an evil frown delivered with that message). Crazily, I was able to ride for almost forty-five minutes. Yeah, I got a lot of shit done!

THEN... we went to the feed store so I could buy a pink bucket and some horse cookies.

THEN... we went to the craft store so I could reward my little babes each with a new craft to entertain them at home.

THEN... we went by the Halloween store so we could get Cooper's and my costumes.

THEN... we came home and I made all this stuff for our semi-haunted house:

(well, not the hands, just the brick walls)

And I also made this:

It's a jail cell. Well, two jail doors actually. The first is for the garage door and the one behind it is for the front door but I ran out of paint.

So after a little snack and a nap (for the kids, not me--I wish) I'll probably haul the kids off to Home Depot to grab more paint and other supplies. Because... today is Tuesday. And I'm VERY productive. Dammit.

And it's only lunchtime!